Mental health seems to be a huge topic of discussion nowadays and some people are saying that “this generation is soft”. Other people like me are saying “it’s because we are becoming aware of toxic cycles, abuse and self reflection” and I’m here for it. In this post, I really want to talk about ways to improve your mental health in this “soft generation”.
Okay, everyone knows this but I have to repeat myself in every post: I’m a SAHM and I’m exhausted. I am mentally and physically exhausted.
My role as a SAHM has made me very much aware that I have a lot of issues I need to work through and a lot of healing to do. And it wasn’t until a year ago that I started to look for ways to improve my mental health and actually take it seriously.
I love my 3 kids. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for them, but holy moly, being indoors all day, everyday -unless I have to run an errand- got me feeling very anxious and I am struggling to just keep sane.
Of course, there are things I’ve been doing to help my anxiety and living in the moment, but until I’m able to buy at least 5 acres of land and be outside in nature all day, anxiety is what I have to deal with.
Stay at home moms play a huge role, and with that role comes a lot of responsibilities that we are not really ready to tackle everyday. And always, at the end of the day, we are emotionally drained and over-stimulated… oh but wait, here comes our husband swinging their penis into their room like we want to do anything in this condition. We don’t want to do anything my boy.
This is real life. Our mental health is real.
According to a study from Gallups in 2012, stay at home moms are sadder, angrier, more depressed and worry with struggles more than working moms.
Ain’t that some sh*t.
At this point in my life where I’m practicing gratitude each day, improving mental health is high up on my bucket list.
You know what they say: if you don’t take care of yourself, who will? I think that’s good advice. In fact, I think it’s great! And this year, I’m going to follow it, because Lord knows I need some good advice. That’s why I’ve decided to make some changes in my life to help me feel happier, healthier and more in tune with myself. Here are five ways you (and me!) improve your mental health in 2023:
Stop comparing yourself to others.
One of the best ways to improve your mental health is by stopping the habit of comparing yourself to others. I did this a lot years ago when I working out at the gym. I compared myself to those wide hips, big booty girls and all it did was put me down because I wanted to look like that. I thought that was what “real women” was supposed to look like to attract a man.
Comparing yourself with others, makes it super easy for negative feelings to take over and make you feel like a failure. This can lead to depression and other mental illnesses.
Instead of comparing yourself with others, focus on achieving your goals. Focus on what makes YOU happy–not what other people are doing or have achieved in their lives!
-focus on yourself and your own goals
-comparing yourself to others can lead to negative feelings
-avoiding comparing yourself to others is a great way to improve your mental health
Be mindful of how you are feeling.
Don’t judge yourself for the way that you feel, no matter what it is. This is an important part to improve your mental health and is often overlooked by people who actually want to improve their mental state. You need to be able to accept the way that things are at that moment in time and practice gratitude without judgment or resistance.
-be aware of how you’re feeling
-don’t judge yourself
-don’t try to change your feelings
-focus on the present moment
-don’t think about the past or the future
Don’t overdo it.
It’s important to know your limits and not overdo it. If you’re anything like me -dealing with a lot of anxiety as a stay-at-home-mom- over-doing it and over-committing yourself can make these feelings worse.
In addition to being careful about how much you commit yourself to, it’s also good practice not to overschedule your day with too many activities. Try not to schedule more than one thing at a time–you’ll likely end up feeling overwhelmed and stuck !
If there’s something that needs to be done (like cleaning), break it down into small tasks so that each step feels manageable and doable on its own – this will help keep things from getting overwhelming as well as allow for breaks when needed during those long days when life gets busy! You can also look into decluttering so you’re not organizing too much! Sounds like heaven!
-don’t over-commit
-don’t over-schedule
-don’t over-stimulate
-don’t over-work
-don’t over-think
Spend time doing something you enjoy
It’s easy to get caught up in this hustle culture, but it’s important to take time for yourself. Try to find activities that you enjoy, such as reading, crafting, or journaling or start a new hobby! Taking a few minutes each day to do something you love can help you relax and clear your mind.
–start a new hobby
–do something that will make you laugh
–dance or sing your heart out
Take time to relax
Don’t overwork yourself with all the things you have to do during the day and make sure you are taking small breaks Deep breathing and mindfulness exercises can help to reduce stress and anxiety. Try to practice these exercises for a few minutes each day. Deep breathing can help to calm the mind, while mindfulness exercises can help to focus your attention on the present moment.
–take a break from what you are doing
–don’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself
–get outside and take a walk
–do something you enjoy that has nothing to do with your children
–practice meditation or pray
–try to go to bed early
Schedule ‘you’ time into your day
Set aside time for your hobbies. Whether it’s painting or writing, taking a class or learning a new language, making sure that you have time to do what makes you happy every day will help keep your mind in check and reduce stress levels overall.
If you cannot
-try to go to bed early
-set aside time for your hobbies
-plan a day off
-take a mental health day
Have a girl’s day out
Plan some time where you can hang out (preferably outside your house) with your friends and tell stories, vent to each other, etc. I know that as SAHMs, it is hard to make time to go out especially if you don’t have a babysitter for that time or you just simply don’t trust anyone to watch your children. I get it. Communication with your partner is essential and there’s no way around it. You need to communicate your needs effectively.
-vent to your friends
-try a group cooking class
-relax at a spa
Self-care is the best way to improve your mental health
It’s also important not only what we do but also how we do them; try not using too stimulants such as coffee (the most I can do is 2 cups of coffee in one day) or energy drinks which may increase anxiety levels instead of decreasing them.
-self-care is important
-self-care is not selfish
-self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity
-self-care can be as simple as taking time to relax and unwind
Being a stay-at-home mom can be a rewarding, but it’s also an overwhelming experience. It’s important to take time to improve your your mental health even when you’re at home. Taking a few minutes each day to do something you enjoy, practice deep breathing and mindfulness exercises, take time for self-care, and connect with others can help to improve your mental health and reduce stress and anxiety.